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Sunday, August 22, 2010

Never Let Go

Well, I don't know if anyone really visits here anymore, so we will see I guess.

I had visions of grandeur of writing several posts a week over the summer, but obviously that did not happen.

So, I will do a short recap of what has gone on with us since my last update.

My oldest daughter J started having some lightheadedness issues and unexplained weight loss.  We are still trying to figure out the cause, but we have eliminated heart issues.  In the interim, she found a lump in her chest that we ended up having to get removed.  Tests showed that it was benign, thank goodness.  She has started her junior year in high school, so it is going to be a tough year.  To help balance her life a little better and to help heal from 2 years of injuries back to back, she is most likely not going to compete at any gymnastics meets this year and will be cutting back on her practice hours.  Then, she will be in the best possible shape both physically and academically for her senior year.

My youngest daughter, M, has started 7th grade and is still really enjoying JH.  She is about halfway through her braces journey and will be glad to get it over with.  She is considering looking at other sports, so we will start thinking about that, although no decisions have been made either way.

My DH received a promotion at work.  Woo hoo!  He has started working on getting healthier as well.  I am so very proud of him.

I am still coaching gymnastics and working at the kids school, so nothing ever changes with me.

My main purpose in writing tonight is for therapy for myself.  While I cannot go into much detail, I do need to work some things out in my heart and soul, and writing has always helped me do that.  So, if you are reading just to catch up on the family, you can stop reading now.  :-)

My spiritual family is in a lot of pain right now.  There has been a betrayal that has affected many, many people.  The fallout from this is life-changing in a vast myriad of ways.  Anyone that has ever been through a huge life changing event - death, divorce, infidelity, violence, etc. can probably relate to what emotions are surfacing.  Anger, denial, acceptance, disappointment, confusion, hopeful, hopeless - all rotating through repeatedly.  I have no idea what I will be feeling in 10 minutes, much less in 10 days.  I do know, however, that all of us MUST remember that God is God and we are not.  Neither is anyone else.  We MUST all remember that we are the body of Christ and that while it is painful to lose a part of the body, that the body can still work and do it's job.  We all MUST remember that we have all failed and fallen short of the glory of God.

We sang this song today and I could feel God's arms holding me while saying these words by Matt Redman:

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I'm caught in the middle of the storms of this life
I won't turn back
I know you are near

And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?

(Chorus:)
Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me

And I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We'll live to know You here on the earth

(Chorus)

Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
Still I will praise You, still I will praise You

(Chorus 2x's)



If you have never heard this song, you can listen to it here:






I will be singing this song a lot in the coming days, I'm sure.

My mom also lost her last living brother today.  So all in all, today was kind of sucky.  But, the good thing is, this heart will hold on for that light that is coming.

Thanks to any of you that still visit.

I will hope to post a happier post soon with pictures and funny stuff.