Everyone has heard that you should never assume anything.
I just want to give you quick proof that this is very good advice - in a purely hypothetical setting, of course.
If you assume, that once you and your children get home from dropping one of the vehicles off at a service center, that you can outrun the children to the closest bathroom, you would be wrong.
If you assume that maybe if you bring everything in from the car, that the child that made it to the closest bathroom would be done by the time you got inside, you would be wrong again.
If, when you screech out the words, 'You are still in there?' to the child in the preferred bathroom, you assume that they won't giggle at your predicament, then, you would be wrong.
If, in your panic as you realize that said child is still in the bathroom and that you will not trip running up the stairs to the next closest bathroom, you would, again, be wrong.
If, in the midst of finally getting to go to the restroom and your phone rings and the caller i.d. shows it is the daughter from the preferred bathroom, and you assume it is her calling you to gloat over getting the closest bathroom, you would, believe it or not, be mistaken.
If you ever find yourself in this predicament - please, please do NOT make that final assumption above. Because, chances are, if you answer that phone call and make a comment about 'talking while peeing' because you assumed it was your child on the other end, it could possibly be someone saying that they just found a cell phone and called the contact listed as "mom" in it to hopefully find out who it belonged to. This person could also be calling from the car service center that you just dropped the car off at. The same place you have to go BACK to in a short while.
So, you see, assumption is bad!! Purely hypothetical situation, of course.
Do you ever wish people could wear some kind of sign that gives everyone kind of a heads up on things you need to know about them? Or vice versa?
For example, I often wonder if I walked around with a sign that said, "ADD. OCD. Depression. Low self esteem. Slightly neurotic," if it would make people be more conscientious with their words and actions, or if it would scare them off or make them decide I was not worth getting to know?
What if the signs said only positive things? "Devoted wife and mother. Desire to be Christ-like. Persistent." Would that then make people want to get to know me? Would they be disappointed if they chose to get to know me based on my sign, and then saw all of the "bad" traits later?
What if it were that everyone wore a sign? Would you greet the person with the sign that said "Addict" or "Murderer" the same way as you would the people whose signs said "Clean and Sober" or "Protective of loved ones?"
What if the signs had positives on one side and negatives on the other? Would you want to only show one side, or would you show both sides?
Some days, I wish I had a sign so that people would know that I have ADD and would therefore not sit and click their pen next to me. They would know that I struggle with self esteem issues and depression and they would not say things in a joking manner that keeps me up crying at night. They would know that I am a little OCD and would not do things willy nilly without a list to check off. Other days, I wish I had my other sign so that people would know that I take my family and my faith seriously.
Then there are days that I wish that other people wore signs so that I could figure out what in the world is going on in people's heads sometimes.
However, one of my favorite things to do is to try to figure out what makes people "click." I love to people watch and find out about them. So, I think the signs would take away from that.
Also, I know that to God, I might as well be wearing a sign since he knows my true heart and spirit. He is the one whose opinion matters most, and that is what I need to remember.
So, my question to you is:
If you could know, beforehand, what would be on the front and back of peoples signs, would you choose to do so?
Would you want to wear a sign?
What would each side of your sign say?
If God made your sign, would it say the same thing as if you made it yourself?
There is a story that I read somewhere that goes something like this:
A woman is teaching her daughter how to make a roast. She gets out the roast and proceeds to slice the end off of it and throw it out. The daughter asks her mother why she threw part of the meat away. Her mom told her that was what you were supposed to do. The daughter asked why again. The mom said that she did not know, that she did it because HER mom did that. They then called the grandmother and asked her the reason. She said that she did it because HER mom always did that when she was making a roast. They then called the great-grandmother and asked her why she always cut the end off of her roasts before cooking them. The grandmother's response? 'Because my pan was too small.'
At church recently, we were discussing about what do we do because of tradition and what do we do because it is what God wants us to do. I believe so many of us have developed not only our sense of right and wrong, but our entire belief system on what we learned from our parents.
While this is okay for small children, as one matures, we need to learn to think for ourselves. With this growth, we also need to learn WHY we think what we think and to be able to defend and support it. I believe that any religion out there has the goal of reaching out to others to try to teach them about God/Jesus/Allah/Buddha, etc. I cannot think of any religion off hand that encourages people to completely avoid others and to not ever try to spread the word. In order to successfully do this, you must have some ammunition. You must have some ready answers and to be able to support your words.
If someone asks you what religion you are, you can give a simple answer. What, if after that, they ask what your religion believes in? That answer, while a little more in depth, would not be too difficult. Then, what if they ask you WHY you believe that? Could you answer that? How would you answer that?
We talked about visiting other churches with your friends. I think it helps you to start asking questions when you are exposed to other beliefs. It makes you see that there are different sets of beliefs out there, and while we may never know this side of heaven which religion is the closest to being right, it will help you make an informed decision if you actively search for info.
Hopefully no one picks a religion because it seems easier than others. It is not supposed to be easy. I mean, Adam and Eve were the only people in the world at one point and they only had 1 rule. They had an intimate relationship with God and they blew it, so we cannot expect to not fail.
I hope that the girls that I teach on Sunday's will at some point question their beliefs. I hope that when it happens, their parents realize what a sign of maturity it is and will allow them to make this journey. I also hope that they understand that all differences may not be salvation issues. Some differences are due to different core beliefs and other are just matters of preference or tradition. That is something I hope these young ladies, and everyone else as well, realize as they spiritually mature. I also hope that they realize that people can agree to disagree and still respect each other's beliefs.
If you are still reading, I really appreciate you listening to your ramblings. I would love any feedback any of you may have, positive or negative. My only request is that no one bashes any one else's comments.
So, do you "trim your butt" because your pan is too small, or because that is how you're parents did it? (In other words, do you believe what you believe because you looked for the answers, or because you followed what your parent's did?)
I have decided that I need a tear duct transplant, mine are obviously defective. They leak all of the time, when I’m happy, when I’m sad, when I’m angry, when I’m frustrated, etc. It seems to be my default response, and frankly, I’m tired of it. Lest you think I am exaggerating, let me tell you about the strange things that I have cried about in the last week:
1) I was talking with a friend who was concerned about some struggles their child was having. She started crying. So, I cried because she was crying.
2) I was talking with a teacher friend at school about a mutual child we were concerned about. I cried because he showed empathy and concern.
3) My mom’s closest sister is not doing well. I cried because she was sick, I cried because my mom was sad, AND I cried because my mom pulled on some crazy inner strength and was dealing with it very well.
4) The strangest – I cried because I saw a young lady, around 18 – 22 years old, walking with an elderly lady holding on to her arm, going into QuikTrip gas station. We walked in behind these women and stood close to them at the Slushie area. The young lady proceeded to read each and every flavor to the older lady, telling her the ingredients in each, as well as explaining what each different machine did; made drinks, icees, shakes, smoothies, coffee, etc. She let her pick out what she wanted and made it for her. As we stood next to each other getting lids, I told the young lady that seeing them together was one of the most heartwarming things I had seen. She thanked me and told me it was her great aunt. I then proceeded to tell her that she looked just like my aunt (see above) that was not doing so good. This girl then proceeded to tell me that she was so sorry and then gave me a hug. As soon as that happened, I started crying all over her. Of course, my children pick this exact time to come around the corner and see their overly emotional mom wrapped in the arms of a complete stranger and crying on her. The girls, knowing me the way that they do, just waited until we were done and we left. You know that you cry too much when something like this doesn’t even faze your children. J
So, while some of these were normal things to cry about, the QuikTrip thing is just ridiculous.
While I know some of you will say that this just means that I care about people, I seriously still think that I have got to get it under control. It is hard to ever deal with anything when all you can do is stand there and blubber. Imagine you wanting to confront someone who has been disrespectful to your children. How effective can you be while crying? Have you ever tried to be professional while crying? It doesn’t work.
Any suggestions on how to “toughen up?” Or at least enough to contain my crying until I am in a more appropriate place?
On another note, a couple of weeks ago, we sung this song at church:
I have heard this song before, but it never grabbed me until we sung it at church. We sing acapella (without instruments) at our church, and to me, that makes the songs much more powerful. It is just a room full of people singing with nothing else to focus on except the words. I personally like to close my eyes when we sing because then it feels like it is just me and God.
I encourage you to listen to this song and really pay attention to the words.
Oh, guess what I did when we sung it at church?
I cried. Big shocker there, huh?
Sign the guestbook and let me know you were here. If I don’t get a lot of signatures, I may just cry. Of course, if I get a lot of signatures, I will definitely cry. So, I will probably end up crying no matter what you do, but you can at least make it a happy cry. J
Wow, it has been a long time. Not sure if anyone still visits or not, but if so, I’m glad you’re here.
I kind of took a blogging break over the summer. I enjoyed my wonderful kiddos and my sweet hubby. Each summer I realize how little time I have left with my kids at home. J. is going into 10th grade this year and M. is starting 6th grade – Junior High!! I cannot believe they are that old. Nor can I believe that I am old enough to have children that old. I still believe that I am a decade younger than I am. It is always a big shock when I realize that I will be turning 40 in January instead of 30.
While we did not do anything extravagant this summer, we did get to spend some quality time together. We had day hours at the gym, which let us have the evenings all together, which will not happen during the school year.
Since I tend to be verbose, here is the Reader’s Digest Condensed Version of our summer:
- J. got to go to church camp in Arkansas - The girls got to gymnastics camp and train with the GA Gym Dawgs. They loved it! - We got to spend some time at our family’s cabin in the mountains – our favorite place - Vacation Bible School - Anniversary trip with hubby to Gatlinburg, Pigeon Forge, and Cherokee - Starting on the orthodontic road with M. - My baby girl turning 12 - Drivers Ed. For J. - J. getting a boot on her foot for tearing up a ligament/tendon and bone bruising - Went to funerals for 3 different people - NOT GIVING IN TO THE DEPRESSION MONSTER!!
The depression monster really tried to get me this summer as I had a lot of things hitting me all at once from many different locations. I really worked hard into not giving in, but it took everything in my power. While normally I have a very low sense of self worth, I was actually quite proud of myself for being able to hold it together this time. I have never had some of the things happen to me before that I had to deal with over the summer; nor have I ever been treated the way I was by some this summer. I got hurt very deeply while dealing with some stresses at my jobs as well as a lot of changes going on at church and at home. There were many nights that I cried myself to sleep, and many days that I hid in the bathroom and cried. There were many times that I could not stop thinking on all of the things that were going on. However, I NEVER gave up hope! This was due to many factors – good friends, good family, and a great God. I remembered all of the wonderful things my “online” friends and my “church” friends, and my “work” friends and my family have said to me along the way. I also remembered the promises that my Father in Heaven made me about never forsaking me and that if He led me to it, He would lead me through it.
I appreciate all of you sticking with me and for being such an important part of my life. Also, you friends listed over there on the right of my page? I truly love you all and send my apologies for not visiting your sites lately. I kind of removed myself from the blog world for a little while. I did miss you all dearly and hope that I will be accepted back. Now I am going to spend my last evening with my family before school starts.
Hug your family – you never know when it will be the last chance you get.
