I refuse!!

For those of you that know me personally, you know that I am still child-like in some ways.  (Probably child-like in some ways as well.  :-D)  I still like to play and hang out with kids.  I usually feel more comfortable with kids than adults.  I like to be silly and play jokes.

However, this is getting harder and harder to pull off.  Mainly due to the fact that by body is not cooperating with me very well.  It is starting to be very obvious that I am not the 20 or 30 something year old that I envision myself to be.

I have blogged on this before, but only about my face and the fact that it looks like it is melting when I lean over to the side.

Now, other body parts are joining in the parade.

My latest fixation is on my knees.  I know have the dreaded elephant knee syndrome.  Have you ever seen elephant knees?  How they are pudgy and wrinkly just above the knee?  How in the world do you make that go away?  I coach gymnastics part time and wear shorts in the summer.  I cannot figure out how I am going to deal with these knees out in public.  I already have to make sure my triceps are flexed the entire time that I coach so that I don't injure anyone with the flapping that occurs there when I move my arms.

Also, my eyes are becoming squishy.  You know when you rub under your eye?  Well, know when I do that, the skin squishes up and stays distorted for a bit.

As a matter of fact, a lot of my skin looks different now.  It is almost like I lost a ton of weight and was left with a lot of loose skin.  Or it is a size too big for my body.

Never mind the spider veins and the grey hair.

It looks like I am gonna have to give in and accept the fact that I am getting older.  I am going to have to change my thought process on the whole thing.  I always thought that I would age gracefully.  I thought that I would be a mature adult with it all together.  Boy, was I mistaken.  I do NOT have it together, I am NOT mature, and I am definitely NOT graceful.

I am trying really really hard to remember that we are all made in the image of God and that he loves who we are on the inside and not what we look at on the inside.  I hope that I do a much better job of instilling that ideal in my daughter's than I did in myself.

Do any of you struggle with self-acceptance?


***Prayer requests:

Travis Shumard just started his first round of chemotherapy for Hodgkin's Lymphoma.  He is 15 years old.

Becky Smith just had a double mastectomy and is starting her treatment for breast cancer.


Please visit and leave them a note of encouragement.

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Blessings of multi-generationalism

I have been very remiss in posting anything lately.  Mainly because I got so many awesome comments on my last entry that I knew that I could never come up with another topic that would generate such great feedback.

We just finished up a much enjoyed spring break.  It was awesome to not have to work either job for several days in a row.  As much as I enjoy both of my jobs, I enjoy my husband and kids more.  We went up to the mountains and spent a few days at the cabin.  It was warm enough to hike and play in the creek, but cool enough that there were no mosquitos or chiggers or poison ivy yet - perfect weather.

We also had Grandparents Day at school.  It is always the last day of school before spring break.  There is a special program just for the kids and grandparents, and then the kids get to leave at noon.  My hubby and I are blessed that we both adore our inlaws.  Our kids are blessed to have 3 full sets of grandparents that all get along with each other.

I have tried to make a point of making sure that my kids appreciate their grandparents.  Neither my husband nor myself have any living grandparents - and haven't for a while.  It is kind of an empty feeling.

My oldest, J., and I were talking about this while hiking at the cabin.  She had a neat way of putting it.  She said that you have your friends to be your friends, your parents to be your parents, and your grandparents are like your friendly parents.  Friends, parents, and grandparents all fill a different role and meet a different need, and none can fill the space of another.  I thought that was a neat way of looking at it.

My grandparents were awesome people and I was so blessed to know them.  In a way, they remind me of my children.  My oldest daughter, while funny and fun-loving, is a nurturer.  She is always careful of others feelings.  My maternal grandparents were the same way.  My youngest daughter, while a nurturer as well, is very up-front and no-nonsense, the same as my paternal grandparents.  While she, and they, would do anything for you, they will also let you know where you stand and did not waste time on stressing about pleasing everyone.  I think this is the best mix in the world as they balance perfectly.  You need both personalities in your life in order to make your life complete.

I think this is why my husband and I work so well together - we balance each other.  If you have two personalities that are completely alike or so completely opposite, you have nothing to use to complete each other.

Well, this was another one of my posts about nothing, so if you are still reading - congrats and thank you.

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